Too Good

Father passing by his teenage daughter's bedroom was astonished to see
the bed was nicely made and everything was neat and tidy. Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the centre of the pillow.
It was addressed "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened the
envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:-

Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you, but I'm
leaving
home. I had to elope with my new boyfriend Randy because I wanted to
avoid a
scene with Mom and you. I've been finding real passion with Randy and
he is
so nice to me. I know when you
meet him you'll like him too - even with all his piercing, tattoos, and
motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion Dad, I'm pregnant and
Randy said that he wants me to have the kid and that we can be very
happy
together. Even though Randy is much older than me (anyway, 42 isn't so
old
these days is it?), and has no money, really these things shouldn't
stand in
the way of our relationship, don't you agree?

Randy has a great CD collection; he already owns a trailer in the woods
and
has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. It's true he
has other girlfriends as well but I know he'll be faithful to me in his
own
way. He wants to have many more children with me and that's
now one of my dreams too. Randy taught me that marijuana doesn't really
hurt
anyone and he'll be growing it for us and we'll trade it with our
friends
for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray
that
science will find a cure for AIDS so Randy
can get better; he sure deserves it!!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of
myself.
Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your
grandchildren.
Your loving daughter,
Rosie.
At the bottom of the page were the letters "PTO". Hands still
trembling, her
father turned the sheet, and read:









PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbour's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my
report card that's in my desk centre drawer.
Please sign it and call when it is safe for me to come home.
I love you!!!